Waiting...and waiting...and waiting...

I used to think that I was a somewhat patient person...that is, until now. It feels like we have been waiting forever (5 weeks equals forever, right?) to find out who our son is! Last Friday when I knew that I wouldn't hear any news that day or into the weekend, I felt just like I did waiting for our first daughter, Asia to be born; despondent and discouraged, convinced that this baby in NEVER coming! I was so antsy waiting for her to come those last two weeks that it really did seem that I might be pregnant forever (Trina was a different story and decided to come three weeks early. Didn't even have any of the baby stuff out of the attic when I went to the hospital!). Similarly, right now it feels like we might be in the process of adoption forever and never be able to hold our precious little boy in our arms. I know in reality that it will only be a matter of days until I'm able to post that we have our referral and will be traveling to get him soon! With my pregnancies, I had all those comforting little reminders, like feet kicking me in the ribs to remind me that my baby was indeed well and on her way. With adoption, I can only wonder about my child. What does he look like? Is he getting the food he needs? Is someone going to hold and cuddle him today, or will he have to stay in his crib without affectionate touch? Everything is out of our control; we can only wait and pray and pray and pray.
I've also been thinking and praying a lot for his birth parents. In Rwanda, it is illegal for a mother to relinquish her child, so oftentimes children are abandoned in public places. If they are still living, I am praying that God would reveal Himself to them, that they would realize that He has a tremendous plan for the son that they brought into the world and that we will now raise, and that the God's comfort would be very close to their hearts. I don't ever want to forget that our gain is someone else's loss.